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reading and wishing

My name is Gaby, I'm 21 and from Miami. I'm an english major who loves to read (duh!)

Currently reading

The Great Gatsby
F. Scott Fitzgerald
Lauren Oliver
Tell the Wolves I'm Home: A Novel - Carol Rifka Brunt A bit of back story about myself before attempting to begin this review:My third uncle I've always had a special relationship with. I won't say he is my favorite uncle, because I would feel bad, but for most of my life he has probably been my favorite person. When I was young, I wanted to be a doctor to be just like him. When he came from Spain I would stick to him like glue, desperate for all the attention he gave me. I felt happy being in his presence. He was, and probably still is, the coolest person in the world to me. I hero worshipped him for many years, and I'm more similar to him in personality and taste than anyone else in my family. He's always been the person who gets me hooked on an awesome show, he always has a new song for me to listen to, a movie that I have to watch. I show him the things I like and wait nervously for his approval because to me his opinion has always mattered more than anyones. He loves art and is the only person in my family who will go with me to a museum and enjoy it. He took me to a bar when I was 16 and let me drink vodka. When he's listening to me speak, I feel like I'm the most important person in the world and I always feel like he gets me. My uncle is also gay. I share this because its important to know that in order to also understand how deeply I felt about this book. It's the 80's, June is 14 years old and her uncle, the one person in the world who understands her, has died of AIDS. June is devastated, but everyone around her thinks that because she was only his niece she shouldn't grieve him so much. The only person in the world who misses her beloved uncle Finn as much as she does, is Toby. Toby is her uncles partner who she's never even met, and who her family thinks is responsible for her uncle's death. June has to deal with not only growing up, but she has to deal with a rapidly deteriorating relationship with her sister Greta, and getting to know the person who Finn loved apart from her. I'm trying to think of the right words to convey what this book meant to me and it's hard. Mostly because I really felt while reading that June and I were so similar, and Finn reminded me so much of my uncle it was painful. I kept imaging myself in her shoes and crying. Mostly, the thing that depressed me about this book was how people build walls around themselves and hide their feelings until they're buried so deep underneath all these things that its difficult to open up. How old resentments that could have been cleared easily fester until they form a definitive crack between two people, a gap that later can't be crossed. How unfair life can be. How a disease like AIDS can exist, how all those people died before they could get the medicines they have now. How the whole disease is cruel.How great people like Finn could cease to exist, how we're all left broken afterwards, not sure what to do with the pieces. Mostly though, this book is about love. How love is never easy. Love hurts you and causes so much trouble that you wonder if it would have been better to never have felt that strongly in the first place. But of course not, because living a life without people who you love so much is a life not worth loving.The books that are toughest to review are the ones you love the most. And the way I love this book is the hardest love. The love that is deep and wedged inside your heart, the love that leaves you feeling raw and hurt and lost. If I could pick only one book to have read this year, this would be it. And I have read some amazing books this year. I can't wait for this book to come out in Spanish so I can share it with my beloved uncle, with my mom and my grandmother, with my friends and with everyone who I can convince to read it. That's the biggest compliment I can give it. ~"That's what I want for you," he said. "I want you to know only the very best people."That's when I broke down and cried, because I already knew the very best people. Finn was the very best person I knew.